Exclusive: Eve Is In Her Soft Girl Era And Loving It—’My Peace Is So Important’

Eve is back! But the star has returned to the scene in a whole new way.

The rapper, actress, and former talk show host is telling her life story in a new book. Who’s That Girl?, and in it, she shares her remarkable journey; that includes her start as Eve of Destruction in the rap game in Philadelphia, joining Ruff Ryders as the First Lady and representing as a woman in hip-hop, making an impact in TV and fashion, her personal relationships and struggles, as well as her triumphs both professionally and personally.

It’s been quite the wild ride. But as I chat with Eve over Zoom, she in her home in London, life is calm in the best way. She sips tea, briefly chats with her husband, Maximillion Cooper, over FaceTime before he takes off on a business flight, and is preparing to pick up her son, Wilde Wolfe, from nursery. The “pitbull in a dress” is now a wife and mother, happily embracing this new chapter.

We spoke with the star about that, why this was the right time to tell her story, life across the pond with her little family, and how the woman she is now compares to the woman she was when she released her first album—25 years ago.

ESSENCE: Congratulations on the new book. Who’s That Girl? How are you feeling about sharing your story with everyone?

Eve: I’m feeling excited. I am excited for people to read it, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say I felt naked. I feel a little naked. I feel a little exposed, but honestly, as far as the actual book itself, the body of work, I am actually excited for people to read it. It’s my story and some things I have touched on before, but I’ll just go that much deeper. So yeah, I think I’m ready. I’m excited.

And like you said, people are getting to know you on a deeper level. In addition to this being the 25th anniversary of your debut album, Let There Be Eve, why was this the right time to tell this story?

I just felt like I was ready to go a bit deeper, I guess, than I did when I was on The Talk. That was my first kind of dip into vulnerability. And I don’t know, I think even when I was on The Talk, I was asked before, oh, would you want to write a book? And I wasn’t ready. And then, I don’t know, it just felt right. I think also having my kid has a lot to do with it. I feel like he’s made me that much more whole of a person, and some of the things that I talk about in the book are the kind of things I want to shed and let go of to be ready for that next chapter in my life with my kid. And so yeah, it just felt like it was time.

Yes. It’s nice. And I have to ask, because I see your page, I see you drinking your tea right now, and you’re living a very soft, English life. It’s giving weekends in the countryside, I must say [laughs]. And as you mentioned in the book, your experiences dancing in the past, the hustle and bustle of where you came from, how is it to be able to be a soft-living, beautiful Black woman with a family living in London, going to the countryside on the weekends? You’re living the dream.

I mean, listen, I still work. I love work. But I think it is about, and it took me years to figure this out, and I’m still trying to figure it out. It is about curating the life that you want. Coming from hip hop, one, knowing that I wanted that to be my life, I was going to do whatever I needed to do to get into the business. Then being in it and staying in it and staying relevant and doing these different things, it definitely tears you down and wears you down. And I think as I talk about in the book, I did a lot of numbing. I did a lot with alcohol and stuff. I think I ran to that because I was so tired. I was exhausted. As much as my life was great, I wasn’t happy.

So I think going from that, and then as I got older, I kind of was just like, I really want some peace within myself. So yeah, it is very important to me. And I love how people are talking about this soft life thing, but it’s like we can have that. It’s what we curate for ourselves. And it’s even more so important because I have a kid. I want to spend time with my kid. I want him to be a kid. I want him to have the opportunities, we all do, to do the things that I didn’t get a chance to do. If that is going to the countryside and seeing some animals on the weekend, that’s amazing. We were at a farm two weeks ago, and I’m like, listen, I’m this chick from Philly. From Philly! I still, sometimes I’m like, wow, I live in London. But it’s also, I feel incredibly grateful that. It’s about the life you curate. I do truly believe that it’s what you want, what’s important to you. And for me, my peace is so important. It is so important. Because I lost it many, many times. Many, many times.

That’s a great message. And how has, you mentioned your son, Wilde Wolfe, how has motherhood transformed you?

My bubbie. He started nursery this week, and it’s just like all these little milestones of things. Even just pushing his little stroller—I almost said pram! These words just come out of my mouth. “Put things in the rubbish!”

“You take the lift and push the pram!” [laughs] I hear a little bit of an accent here and there.

It’s hard not to because now I try to keep things consistent for him. So now I’m saying more things. But even just that, it’s so nice to drop him off in the morning and pick him up in the afternoon and just hang out with him and watch him grow. He honestly makes me so happy. I can’t wait to see who he turns out to be. But yeah, everything I do from this point on is just about how can I make his life better?

I love that. And what is that, knowing the journey that it was to get to this point? I can definitely relate. I had my own fertility and fibroid things, and you opened up about those obstacles, and now you have your dream child. He’s in nursery, y’all in the pram [laughs]. So what is it like for you to know that you have everything that you wanted, that you were once uncertain about?

It’s beautiful. It’s beautiful. I think it’s another lesson for me to be determined and really believe. We deserve what we want. And I think it’s just another lesson of that. I talk about this in the book where I got to a point where I kind of was like, oh, well, maybe it’s not for me. And then it was like, no, no, it can happen. No, you deserve to be a mom. Why not? So, yeah.

And I also have to say, I love, from what I can see, because I don’t know your business, but I love what you and your husband Maximilian have, and it just seems so genuine. You guys just seem just like you’re the perfect pair. How has that relationship transformed you as well?

There’s no perfection because we get on each other’s nerves. We’ve been together 14 years now, so we know each other very well. But I will say we mostly want the same things in life, the big sh-t. And that’s important. We’re very honest with each other, even when it hurts, we’re very honest, and he was an anchor for me. I’m very much stressy. I’m a stressy worry person, and he’s very much like, we’re not even there yet. Just relax. Just give it a minute. So he helps me to kind of slow down and stay two feet on the ground when I need it. He’s been with me through lots of things and getting myself together. He’s been with me through panic attacks, all kinds of things. So yeah, he’s a good support system. I do feel like he’s a good dude.

Fourteen years in, he’s a good dude. [Laughs]

You know what’s funny? When I listened to the audiobook, I actually got really emotional on his chapter and I was like, oh. It just reminded me as to why. And not that you forget, but when you’ve been in a relationship, you feel like that. It’s like that with friendship. It doesn’t matter. Your family, you love who you love, the people in your life, but sometimes life happens and you kind of just don’t have that same appreciation at the forefront. And just reading that was just like, ah, that’s why I love him. This is why we’re together. And it was actually really beautiful. It was really a nice moment for me.

Oh, I love that. The person that you were in the early days, when your first album came out and you were just working hard, like you said to exhaustion, just trying to get your name out there, who is she in comparison to the woman that we see now, living in London, enjoying the lunch dates, just having some ease in her life?

Yeah, I mean, that person is me still. It’s just that I’ve now given her some rest. I don’t need the attitude. Everything that got me to that place, to that first album, all those tools, building up the wall, being hard, hustling, all that stuff, I needed to make it in the industry that I was in. And all of that is still a part of who I am, because I’m going to fight for what I want always. Also, I’m from Philly, and Philly is feisty, so they’re never ever going to be taking any of that away. But yeah, it’s still the same girl. It’s just that sometimes you don’t need those same tools as you grow. Some things you do have to let go. So I like to think that I’m the same person. It’s just like you said, I’m a little softer. I’m a lot softer, actually, which is nice.

For more, see the full video of our conversation above. Who’s That Girl? is now available wherever books are sold.